Back-Stabbing Church People
I have done my fair share of back-stabbing. Being the one caring only for myself and my agenda. I would do everything in my power to be "right", even if I knew I was wrong.
But it really hurts when it happens to you.
I have decided to speak my mind, to question what I believe and not be satisfied with easy answers. I want more. That is the problem. I believe if someone wants to follow Christ fully, dangerously, etc., you must live a life either alone or with thick skin. Which I have neither.
Questions make you stupid, right? Thoughts make you stupid, right? Ideas make you stupid, right? Maybe.
I almost want to stop. Just walk away from any type of "journey", if that journey is only going to be criticized. Or do I need to grow thicker skin? Do I need to shut up or shut other people up? Do I need to forget others?
No.
I will not stop.
My journey is sacred. My journey is mine. Yes, I have chosen to make this public. Only in hope that others will unite common journeys and do this together. I want to suck the life out of life! I don't want to be merely content. I want more. More than what I was given, what I have, what I see before me and what others want for me.
Argue that.
Criticize.
Feel special.
I want Christ.
But it really hurts when it happens to you.
I have decided to speak my mind, to question what I believe and not be satisfied with easy answers. I want more. That is the problem. I believe if someone wants to follow Christ fully, dangerously, etc., you must live a life either alone or with thick skin. Which I have neither.
Questions make you stupid, right? Thoughts make you stupid, right? Ideas make you stupid, right? Maybe.
I almost want to stop. Just walk away from any type of "journey", if that journey is only going to be criticized. Or do I need to grow thicker skin? Do I need to shut up or shut other people up? Do I need to forget others?
No.
I will not stop.
My journey is sacred. My journey is mine. Yes, I have chosen to make this public. Only in hope that others will unite common journeys and do this together. I want to suck the life out of life! I don't want to be merely content. I want more. More than what I was given, what I have, what I see before me and what others want for me.
Argue that.
Criticize.
Feel special.
I want Christ.
posted by Joshua Sager at
9:25 PM
10 Comments:
I want to suck the life out of life! I don't want to be merely content. I want more. More than what I was given, what I have, what I see before me and what others want for me.
Dude, for that reason alone you are going to agitate others. Most want that in their hearts, but can't overcome their comfort addiction enough to take a risk and go for it.
Look, I drop F-bombs at least a few times a week, but never at church. I do a lot of things in my daily life that I would never do at church, so my church brothers and sisters only see one facet of me. If I showed them the whole me, like you guys have been doing, no doubt some would think differently of me. Such is Churchianity... where Comfort is king, and Jesus gets to be the front man as long as he doesn't try to cast King Comfort from his throne.
Personally, dude, I don't know what on earth you're talking about when you talk about "Backstabbing Church People". I go to church, and I know that I, for one, never backstab ANYONE at my chuch, not even that guy, Mitch Drake, head of the junior high department, twenty-two years old, who had sex THREE times before marriage and and with different women each time (one was questionable)... I know that I would NEVER backstab ANYONE, not Mitch or even Mark Jefferies, who is the organist at my church and who hangs a nude picture of Johnny Depp in his dresser in the men's room... I would NEVER sink so low into backstabbing Mark, or Mitch... Not even Barb Greyson, who is the head of the funds department and is so addicted to painkillers and booze that she knocks over the collection plate on purpose, but acts as if it were an accident, and then, when cleaning up the contrived mess, and after pocketing a $5 or a $10 or a $20 dollar bill, goes to the nearby bar and gets soused... I would NEVER backstab these people and I don't even know who would do this "backstabbing to other church people" thing you talk of, buddy, 'cause it aint me... No way... No sir're...
I lead worship at my church.
The day after our then-present "praiseleader" decided to walk out with about 36 hours notice, I was asked to step in. Reluctantly, I did.
The next week, I found out one of our church trustees had been telling people (rather sarcastically) that I had been vying(sp?) for that position all along.
That trustee never saw my struggle.
That trustee never experienced my journey.
That trustee doesn't even know me...
That trustee isn't trust-worthy.
A wise man once told me, "You cannot judge Christianity by the actions of Christians" You can only judge Christianity by the actions of Christ.
Your ultimate focus is right. Jesus is enough.
I'll end with this story: A farmer decided to get rid of his dog, so he threw the dog down an old well, and began filling it with dirt. Just about the time the well was full of dirt, the dog jumped out and ran back to the house.
The cat looked at the dog and said, "How the heck did you get out of that well? He was burying you alive?!?"
The dog replied, "Every time he threw that dirt on me, I just shook it off and stepped up."
Shake it off and step up. That's what I did. And its made it easier to walk in love and forgiveness toward people like that trustee.
Now, instead of shaking my head in disgust at her, I just bow my head and ask the Lord to help her (and to help me see her thru His eyes).
Unfortunately, (or maybe not...), your journey, allbeit sacred, is not yours. It is His.
And if you truly want Christ, you'll eventually have to come to terms with the fact that you're surrounded by other Christians. And its those very Christians that will fulfill your journey.
Check out "Blue Like Jazz" by Donald Miller. It'll help with some of this.
In Christ.
i used to use the F-bomb but it says in the bible not to. it even uses the word "F-bomb" in the new generation-x post-grunge bible called "THE BIBLE FOR DUMMIES"...
is this post about
A. "Back Stabbing Church people" as in "Church people who backstab"?
or is this about
B. "Back Stabbing Church people" as in, "Stabbing Church People in the back?"
answer: B
Wow. Jeff thanks for your thoughtful input. And Josh, I resinate with how you feel.. We've been stabbed in the back. Somewhat similar to what Jeff said. This journey is so incredible. It can make you bleed, piss you off, bless you into bliss and give you wisdom about the things on God's heart. That's ultimately what this is all about. God's glory! And in church I don't see too many folks seeking to give God glory....Breaking free of the Matrix is ugly at first glance.. Go for Jesus all the time. I want him too. Desperately....
trish, I love what you said! This incredible journey IS ultimately about God's glory.
(but please, no more Matrix references. They're sucking my will to live...)
As or you Josh, "I know what you're thinking, 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill?
(sorry. couldn't resist)
Condescending-Churchy-Pat-Answer-of-the-Week:
"Well Josh, if you would take up your cross and follow Jesus, then the cross would cover your back so people couldn't stab you there."
(Sure, then they'd go after your...ahem...naughty bits.)
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I believe (oh, yes I do!!), I mean, I think you are blogging about Church People Stabbing Church People in the back. Anyway, whever a regular group of people are together repeatedly, it seems to turn into High School All Over Again, with gossip, backstabbing, competitiveness, and such things that certain people are called to do when in groups. It's almost like God tests us after bidding us come together, and showing us how we sin right uder His nose, in His House, and then we are judged fiercely by the Christian-haters. Of course they are all doing the same thing in their workplace, at the coffee house, at home, etc etc.
Soo hard to be good....
I'm trying...
Love Jesus!
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